I hope you read the title and thought, NO!

Or at least thought; not really, not most of me, not much of the time.

Broken is used too much in our culture: I’m broken, broken heart, broken spirit, broken home, broke – when out of money, broken record, broken arrow*, broken bridges (in relationships), emotional break downs, breaking a mirror is bad luck.

We are the words we use and the words we hear over and over. Literally. You hear words of criticisms and self-judgments. They are transmitted to your brain, triggering a chemical cascade, which triggers sensations and emotional feelings which activates behavior including more thoughts. And then there is a conscious, or less than conscious, thought like, “I knew it,” “I told you so,” “I’m screwed,” “I’m a jerk “(or worse). All this validates beliefs that there is something wrong. With you. You are messed up somewhere inside. Broken.  

Before you argue that broken only means that something is damaged and no longer in one piece (often true), therefore, can be repaired (also true), consider the implication of the word: the thing is not usable and may actually be beyond repair. When you say to yourself anything that implies your brokenness you set in motion the brain chemistry of disappointment, failure and hopelessness.

I invite you to challenge that notion. Things DO break. We do have our heart hurt so badly we feel like we won’t be able to do love again, go on, find hope.

Behind all brokenness is a divine wholeness that lives within you. In your cells, in the field of energy that fills and surrounds you. This something can’t be broken.Consider offering to yourself the language of wholeness. I’m fine, this will pass, this is not the way I want things to be, but it is what I face now. The more you transform your words the more you have a chance for living joyfully.

*Broken arrow is an accident involving nuclear weapons or supplies that does not cause a nuclear war risk. News to me! Thought I’d add it for those of you who also wondered.

This is how I captured the concept of brokenness in a poem:

Reconsider Your Broken Heart

Turn back and reconsider your broken heart
Reconsider your brokenness
When the vase tumbles from the counter
And breaks beyond repair
You reach for the rose, the iris, the ferns
Pull them from the wreckage of glass
Place them lovingly into a new vase
The flowers reconfigure into a new formation
Perhaps more beautiful than before
Refreshed and rearranged
Flowers that once thrust their roots down into the earth
Gain strength from their arduous
Search for nourishment through hard clay and stones
Plucked from their habitat, resilient
They reach anew to morning rays
You are not your brokenness any more than
the flowers are the broken vase
When life leaves you cracked and scarred
You can become sharp, frayed, rigid
Instead love the disrepair of your heart
Let your roots find nourishment in
Faith and love and trust
When you reach for your desires you must
Break free from beliefs that hold you back
Most importantly the belief that you are broken
In any form
Consider your heart strong or weak,
Open or closed, scarred or beautiful
Cracked or pristine but
Do not consider your heart to be broken
At least not broken beyond use
Break up with your self-imposed ruler
Break your rules
Break your vows
Break open
Break open again
Break everything but your heart
 Sally Churgel  ©9/16/19